NAME: Stanley
OTHER FAKE ALLIAES: The Dealer, Drift King, Mr. Ass, Up in Yo Crib Dawg
KNOWN TO: M.E.G Base Gamma, Blanche, basically the entire entity page.
LAST SEEN: Level 1, flipping a guy that said he looked skinny.
Drawn picture of this asshat's below status stance.
DESCRIPTION:
Stanley, otherwise known as 'The Dealer', 'The Drift King', 'Mr. Ass' and 'Up in Yo Crib Dawg' those are shitass names jesus christ is a stick-figure-like entity with unknown capabilities. He always mentions about something missing from him, and is constantly trying to find it through any means necessary. Reports say that Stanley used to work at the Terror Hotel, to which Stanley confirmed he did before he got fired for 'unnecessary behavioral issues'. Specific goals range from specifics ("i need to find a pool of almond water so i can fill it with peanuts then drown in it) to the very clear-cut ideas ("can i fuck your wife") For this, Stanley is highly unpredictable at every level, as it has been shown that he has found out how to noclip out of levels. The clear consensus of Stanley is that he tries to take care of his stag beetle, but no apparent source has been found on how he found the beetle to begin with. However, photos of Level 0's wall being punched open should suggest that Stanley punched the wall open with inhuman strength.
Stanley appears to have encountered and befriended multiple entities found inside the Backrooms, with games of Mario Kart Wii being the apparent source of befriending these entities. The list of entities he befriended includes:
If found, please rip the skin off his face i can't fucking stand him THIS IS BULLSHIT leave him to his own will. He has stated that he doesn't do well with 'vent shafts, it reminds me of scare'. Since the M.E.G has no apparent way to track Stanley, it's recommended that any wanderers near proximity of Stanley follow him to keep company. Currently, the connection between him and the stag beetle has proven no results. However, small traces of moist carpet water was found on the beetle, leading M.E.G Operative Davey Jonesy to believe that the beetle originated inside the Blue Channel.
Interview N68769000
Interviewer: M.E.G. Ex-M.E.G. Member Davey Jonesy
Interviewee: Mr. Ass The Dealer Stanley
Time Started: 4:20:20, April 20. Time elapsed; 2 days, 9 minutes, and 34 seconds.
The recording starts with Davey Jonesy looking into the camera, whispering into it. The only part of it we can add to this page is “Out of all the fucking awesome ass entities, and they give me the motherfucking stickman.”
Stanley; “Uhh, you havin some problems or something?”
Davey; “Nope! Not at all! Anyways, let’s begin! Name?”
S; “Drift King.”
D; “What? Actual name.”
S; “Oh, then The Dealer.”
D; “No, no, what you commonly call yourself.”
S; “Oh, then Up in Yo Crib Dawg.”
D; (whispered) “I swear to fucking god”
D; “YOUR ACTUAL NAME!”
S; “Jeez, man, no need to get violent. It’s Stanley.”
D; “There! Now, what the hell are you doing here?”
S; “Doin yo mom.”
D; “What?”
S; “What? You don't know RWJ? He's doin y-.”
D; “Alright, skip all of this. How did you befriend those entities?”
S; “A nice game of doi-”
D; “No.”
S; “Fine. Through a nice friendly game of Mario Kart. Is that all you need?”
D; “You expect me to believe that?”
S; “Why else would I tell you that? I'm not like Osama Bin La-”
D; “Partygoers are in no way going to stop chasing you because of Mario Ka-.”
S; “Then I guess I’m famous as he-.”
D; “You’re no-.”
S; “Says you, dol-.”
D; “Shut u-.”
S; “N-.”
D; “Ye-”
S; “No.”
D; “Fine. You w-”
S; “Win? I always do. It's my nature.”
Davey sighs, which is cut off by Stanley also sighing.
D; “WILL YOU FUCKING S-”
S; “Stop? No. Confront me about my pet, and we can talk.”
D; “Alright fine! Let’s talk about the Beetle. Where did you get him?”
S; “In a fat level, otherwise known as yo mo-”
D; “No joke, shu-”
Stanley proceeds to cut him off. This resulted in a span of 2 days of them arguing, 9 hours of which with Stanley asleep.
Near the end of the recording.
D; “Shut up! I could carve a better man out of a banana!”
S; “Prove it then, fatass.”
D; “Mother-
S; “Fu-”
D; “I’m done!”
He points at the other workers, wondering how he argued for two days straight.
D; “He’s your problem now!”
Davey storms out of the base. His current whereabouts is unknown.
S; “So, anyone wanna play Mario Kart? I got Ultra Shortcuts..”
Whispering can be heard.
S; "Bloody hell, how did I survive that drunk mess for 2 days..?"
Any info on where Davey Jonesy is will be greatly helpful in helping him officially “retire” from his job. We hope to give Davey his “paycheck” for the interview, and a good apartment building on Level 11.
NAME: Mr. Beetle
OTHER FAKE ALLIAES: that's a scary looking mofo, HOLY SHIT A BEETLE OH-, The Overlord of All Beetles, 🪲im/🪲er, The Evil Overlord Mr. Beetle
KNOWN TO: Menace of the Backrooms, Reddit, Instagram, Snapchat, IFunny, Vine, 4chan, 8chan.
LAST SEEN: Coding Room, currently scripting the Backrooms.
The legit creator of the Backrooms. Picture taken by Stanley.
Description:
Mr. Beetle has been found to be the creator of the Backrooms turned into a stag beetle 'for shits and giggles'. Sources have pointed out that he's been trying to guide Stanley so he could take some Normal Pills and turn back to normal. When confronted on how the Backrooms still functions on a Macintosh 128K, he simply said: "idk man, i used this since 87', hasn't failed me since" how the fuck does this idiot hire such a retard says you Currently, Mr. Beetle is being held in the hands of Stanley, considering him his 'disciple' of all things.
Mr. Beetle has been observed giving orders to entities to give “funny pranks” theyre funny! on unsuspecting wanderers when separated from Stanley. Do not leave a helicopter in his presence Do not leave a gun in his presence Do not let him interact with any entity Just don’t let anything in his presence alone. This will result in certain fame on Reddit deaths of you and others.
Mr. Beetle, even though the creator of the Backrooms, is not to be treated as your evil overload god Yes you are Please stop editing this page no thank you, im fine. to escape the Backrooms, as he normally leads these people to Level Party! a party! itll be so funny though :(
Mr. Beetle is confirmed to have billions of dollars from the Frontrooms and Backrooms. What he does with this money is currently unknown, When is the next Backrooms update? Soon, soon! and he has shown no interest in the money at all. If he ever drops money on Level 11, do not pick it up, as you will be teleported to Level 906. Blanche wasn’t amused yea she wasnt please help me
It is assumed that where Mr. Beetle originated from (Level 0), as it has even more insect creatures, which is theorized to be past company employees. they work in the walls shut up the fuck theres more of them oH SHI-
According to Overseer Mr. Beetle Evil Overlord Mr. Beetle Overseer orders, Stanley is to be protected at all costs, since he is considered the only chance at escaping the Backrooms. Stanley is currently being held at the Coding room, where Mr. Beetle is stored at. WHEN IS THE NEXT BACKROOMS UPDATE MR. BEETLE IM WORKING ON IT WE CAN GLITCH THROUGH THE FUCKING WALLS MR. MAKER THATS THE WHOLE PURPOSE OF THE GAME YA FUCKWIT
Interview N76181818420
Interviewer; M.E.G. Veteran Mr Buttcrack Theodore Kindly
Interviewee; Evil Overlord Mr. Beetle
Time started; December 1st, 21:01, 2021. Time elapsed for 20 minutes.
Recording starts with the camera pointed at Mr. Beetle politely sitting on the table. Theodore can be heard saying “What the fuck this motherfucking Beetle can talk what the?”
Mr. Beetle; “Excuse me, I can hear you.”
Theodore Kindly; “Uhm, right, right, so, what I got here is that you’re the creator of the Backrooms?”
MB; “Correct. Proud one man job. Hard to do, you know?”
T; “Uh, yea yea, and why exactly are you a beetle?”
MB; “You aren’t supposed to judge people based on their looks, you know?”
T; “Sorry, then, but we’re just curious.”
MB; “Then I guess it’s because I find it funny.”
T; “You find it funny to be a Stag Beetle.”
MB; “Correct.”
A few seconds of silence is heard, before Theodore turns a page over and clears his throat
T; “Alright then, I wanna know about the…incidents.”
MB; “My pranks? Why exactly?”
T; “You’re killing people with them.”
MB; “A small sacrifice.”
T; “You’ve killed 34 people.”
MB; “Compared to the Backrooms, small.”
T; “In violent ways.”
MB; “Did you mean funny?”
More silence is heard.
T; “Alright then. Explain your partnership with Stanley.”
MB; “A fair trade. I help him turn to a normal being and he grants me fame on Mario Kart!”
T; “Uh, you sure that’s a good deal?”
Mb; “Very much. My intelligence is very high, you know. In fact, give me a three word sentence. It can be more.”
T; “Hmm, fine, I guess, ‘We are the light that shines through the Backrooms.’”
MB; “Cool, now listen to this.”
Mr. Beetle can be heard clearing his throat, which sounds like horns clashing against each other.
MB; “‘My group of people will shine a beam of photons down the deep, dark barrier known as the Backrooms.’ Impressive, hmm?”
T; (whispered) “Not really”
T; “Sure, Mr. Beetle. Now, can we pack up this interview?”
MB; “Sure, just one question.”
T; “What is it?”
MB; “Guess what?”
T; “What?”
MB; “Chicken butt.”
Theodore walks out the room, not stopping the recording.
MB; “Hey, it was funny! Mr. Buttcrack!”
Mr. Beetle also leaves the room, following Theodore while saying Chicken jokes.
Submitting my resignation.
-Theodore Kindly
by Mister Rustysporks
And also by YourWeirdPlant
pictures: Macintosh by Flickr: https://live.staticflickr.com/6127/5979563112_41af1406ce_b.jpg, drawn snippets by Rusty.
